It Gets Better...

It feels like it's been awhile since I've posted anything but I can never seem to find the time to sit down and put something together.

The summer has wrapped and we are in the early weeks of fall where it can still reach 20 degrees, the trees still have their colourful leaves and the nights are perfect for wearing just a merino sweater. I know for many people this is their favourite season which I can understand. I still love my summer but I can appreciate the beauty that is this season.

My summer was capped off with a trip out to Newfoundland to visit my brother and his wife and meet my new niece Iris. It was great to finally meet her - I look forward to watching her grow up and I look forward to being the cool uncle. There won't be many children in my life so I plan on being as active as I can in hers despite the thousands of miles that keep us apart.


Have you been hearing about all these gay teen suicides? It's pretty fucked up - I'm sure they've been happening all along but for whatever reason these suicides as of late have caught the attention of the media. With that spotlight comes along an outcry from advocates and celebrities all preaching that "It Gets Better". Gay teen suicide isn't something new so I think it's interesting how much attention it's getting right now. I made a point to watch several of these videos that have been posted and I encourage you to do the same. I don't think they are overly ground-breaking but I think they are interesting and I like that they are offering some outreach by talking about The Trevor Project. I doubt any of the straight celebrities themselves have had to go through the suffering that these kids are experiencing in their lives for being different. Hollywood is a long way away from torment that is going on in the locker rooms of high schools in small town America. No matter how mainstream we think gay has become there is still some child out there who hates himself because of the way his peers make him feel. All he wants is to be accepted and to stop being afraid. He would rather kill himself that be the punchline of one more joke or the be part of the hot gossip thats spreading around the hallways at school. With all the social media that's out there - I can only imagine the shit-storm of harassment a gay youth would be subjected to. From Facebook messages, texts, tweets and message boards - there really is no such thing as feeling safe. Kids can be pretty mean too - I know all too well some experiences from high school that I would love to forget. But those memories stay with you forever and no matter how far away you get from them, it takes little effort to think about how dark your world was and how helpless you felt at the time.

With all the resources kids have these days it's hard to believe anyone would feel completely isolated but obviously it's still happening as proven with these deaths in the past couple weeks. Back in my teen years it took serious effort to see something that made gay seem okay. Nowadays the whole gay thing is so in your face; from SNL to Glee to Ellen - I mean clearly the "gay movement" has come some distance over the last decade. So when does it get better for these kids? When will they finally feel free? High school is cruel place for everyone not just for the queers. Everyone is trying so hard to fit in that in the end no one really ever does. With that being said, I think these videos are opening minds and will challenge teachers and guidance counsellors to be more awake and take more responsibility for what is going on in their classrooms. They must show intolerance for any type of bullying or harassment and discipline those kids who feel like they rule the school. It won't happen overnight but there are baby steps going on. When I was out in Newfoundland I visited my brother's school (he's a teacher) and one of the first things I saw was a poster on the wall in the hallway talking about how uncool it was to say "that's so gay" because it promotes a negative message. I was totally taken back when I saw it - here we were out in the middle of nowhere (King's Cove for the record) and it was the last thing I would've expected to see up on a wall. But some teacher or counsellor or whoever took a moment and put it up because they felt it was important. If more educators had that courage to step up like that it would shed some light into what can be a very dark place for many kids - their schools.

Let's talk solutions: The Trevor Project is doing some amazing things to brighten the lives of struggling gay youth. One of their latest campaigns is called "I'm Glad I Failed" which promotes the positive stories of youth who failed at killing themselves and how grateful they are to be alive. Blunt yes - but the reality is that kids are trying to kill themselves everyday just to escape the hardship that has become their lives. Please check out the website http://www.thetrevorproject.org and browse through the many great things this site has to offer - this is such a important resource that needs to be used. If this is a sign of things to come, then life for these kids really will get better.