Round 2

I know there were some audio issues with my first post so hopefully with this second one they are better. I didn't preview this one because I think that when I do that I'm potentially going to censor what honesty I try give in these kind of postings. Hopefully JJ will be a better performer in future posts as he was a bit shy tonight.

Wow these take forever to upload... mind you I guess this one is a bit longer than the last one and I also shot it with higher resolution. What can I say, I'm still learning...

Video Blog?

Let's try this baby out...

Happy Anniversary!!

This was taken on our first day together.

Year of the Dog

It's hard to believe that exactly one year ago today a little tiny dog came into my life, one that would completely change everything that centered me and add so much love. Getting him was rather a quick decision that I began making over a couple beers with a friend at the local pub.

My friend William was going on and on about his friend's little chihuahua and that it was the sweetest little thing in the world. How they pampered it, how they spoiled it, how well trained it was, etc. It got me excited I'm not going to lie and before I knew it I was at home searching websites on how to get one of my own. I looked at lots of different pictures of toy breeds but I was in love with the first posting I saw which if you believe or not was JJ. After several emails with his owner I convinced them to let me have him. Apparently there was quite of bit of interest in my little guy but in the end my honesty and integrity made me the best match. Within 3 days, yes 3, I was preparing for his arrival, making sure I had read as much as I could about my new adventure. He came from a loving space, one that unfortunately changed and one that no longer could support him. His owner wanted only the best for JJ so I did my best at the time trying to be that kind of home for him. It was his 4 month birthday when I got JJ and his previous owner only had him for 3 weeks. They had got JJ from a breeder who had been breeding chihuahuas for 17 years but due to a job transfer they couldn't keep JJ. Much to my luck I got him for a very fair price, much less than they had paid and I didn't have to wait any length of time to adopt him.

Our first week together was very trying in the sense that I was having troubles with the pad training, he was also very shy and seem to love me only whenever anybody came to visit. I remember this one night in the depth of my frustration I got down on my knees in front of my bed and cried. I'm not sure what was the breaking point, but ultimately in that moment I felt that I might have bitten off more than I could chew. I remember praying for some sort of assistance from the higher power to give me the patience it would take to get JJ to listen to me and learn what he needed to know. Obviously as the weeks went on it got easier and easier and the bond that I developed with JJ grew stronger and stronger. Little did I know that while that was happening I was also re prioritizing what was important to me and soon before long what used to matter to me didn't and what did matter to me was all new. For something I felt I knew so little about all of sudden it became what I knew best... It's funny how a pet or even a person for that matter can affect your well being. Words can't express just how much JJ influences me not only in the choices I make but also in how I think and love.

There is not a day that has gone by in this last year where JJ hasn't done something to amaze me. He has got so clever over the months and he has so much personality you can't help but adore him. For those who say "a dog is just a dog" have never felt the things I have felt in this past year. Not only is he someone to come home to but he's also a companion on so many levels. I have taken him almost everywhere I go and he has met so many people and has had so many great experiences. In a way I think I feel the need to share the joy of him just so that others can experience what I get to have all the time. I know that sounds odd but I have so much pride in my little guy that I need to show him off from time to time. With that being said I'd like to say thank you to all the people I've forced JJ on over the last year.... I don't mean this in the physical sense but rather in the way that in order to be part of my world you've had to endure my constant focus on JJ and I know that lesser people may not have been so loving. JJ is a big reason that 2007 has been my worse dating year ever, I'm not going to lie... but I do look forward to a time where I will be able to better balance the boyfriend and the baby at the same time. They say it's possible and I think I'm getting better at setting boundaries so we'll have to see how 2008 turns out. Wish me luck!

Minnie the Matchmaker...

OK.. it's happened again! I'm beginning to think I was put on this earth to bring couples together... What is it that makes this happen? I don't even feel like I meet as many guys as I used yet that doesn't seem to stop it. What I'm talking about is friends dating friend's exes... Isn't this supposed to be taboo? I thought there was some general rule about this somewhere that this is considered kind of disrespectful or something. Apparently not as it keeps happening to me...

I've got good social skills, I'm not afraid to approach someone if the the timing's right. I can make things happen so to speak if the feelings are mutual. I've been very blessed to have met all the people I have met, as most people live their lives staying only in a one or two social circles and that's all they do. For me ever since coming out, having alot of friends has never been an issue, nor has dating for that matter. I've been able to make it work no matter where I am, no matter where I go. Going back to the point of this post, it's seems only in the last few years where I'm seeing this trend of friends of mine dating guys that I've introduced them to because I JUST DATED THEM! Talk about fishing from the same pond.... For the record, I am not guilty of this behaviour, not once have I dated a friend's ex just after they finished dating them.

There is a silver lining to all this venting, as much as things didn't work out between me and all those exes, I can at least say I'm good at what I do. Everyone ''I've'' put together is still together and that's something that doesn't happen everyday. It started with Kevin and Michael (which has been going strong since 2004), then Stephen and Andy (also since 2004, which was also the year I decided I needed new friends, clearly I'm sure you understand why). In 2005 it was Joe and John which is probably some of my best work ever and then recently just this summer it was Bill and Sean.

I've never found anything for myself that has lasted nearly as long as most of these, I often think I'll be single for life which is odd because I've got so much to give. We all have our excuses as to why we don't have boyfriends, girlfriends, whatever but I think it's the strongest individuals who end up holding out. I'd like to think that when I'm ready, he will come. I'm not sure when ''ready'' will be, but I know that in the meantime I'm not going to be moping around. I'll continue to put myself out there, smile when I'm supposed to and have fun with my friends. Although I must confess that 2007 has been my worst dating year EVER! It's funny how we put some much validation of ourselves in other people, so much so that often we forget how much we like being who were are.

We all hit lows, there are countless times that I've gone out with the friends and my ''fun'' factor is determined by how much attention I got instead of how many funny moments there were. Secretly inside there is a part of me that will always wonder why it's not happening to me, like when you see someone out (desirable or not) with their boyfriend or whatever and you say to yourself ''how could that person find someone and I can't?'' It's a shallow thought I know, but it's true. Anyway until I figure it all out I guess I'll continue my role as the the little matchmaker and hope that someday someone will return the favor...